Who among us doesn’t feel a little less than fit these days? After a year or so spent in self–iso-quar-lockdown while physically distancing ourselves from our trainers, things probably aren’t as tight as they used to be, and the approach of summer swimsuit season in the vax era comes with an extra frisson of self-consciousness. Not even celebrities are immune to this insidious post-pandemmy body image anxiety. Case in point: the Fresh Prince himself, Will Smith.
“I’m gonna be real wit yall – I’m in the worst shape of my life,” he posted on his official Instagram account yesterday.
The accompanying photo shows Smith standing on a sun-dappled lawn beside a pond, gesturing expansively. The actor— and real-life actual father — is wearing what appear to be trunk-cut boxer briefs and a track jacket, unzipped to reveal what can only be described as the actor’s impressive dad bod.
A couple things: First, that caption is what we call a textbook humble brag. Recent data show that the absence of the cut-glass abdominal muscles commonly referred to as a “six pack” decreases Smith’s stone-cold foxiness by exactly negative 100-percent. For the laypersons out there, that’s a 100-percent increase; Will Smith is empirically sexier in his current manifestation.
For reference, here is a clip from 2007’s I Am Legend that Smith posted in March of last year:
Our experts can identify no appreciable decrease in sex appeal between 2007 and now. That’s science and you cannot argue with it.
Secondly, we’ve just received confirmation that Smith has been awarded the gold medal in INTERNET for this week. First place. He won the internet. Let’s go to the comments:
“F*cking love it,” replied Suicide Squad co-star Joel Kinnaman. “That’s confidence…”
Questlove: “This is the most amazing post in the history of social media.”
Ava Duvernay: “I see no ‘worst’ here.”
Amy Schumer: “You look good!”
Director Michael Bay even offered Smith another Bad Boys sequel on the spot!
And lastly, with over six million likes, this image seems to herald the approach of a new era. Get ready for it. Embrace it. Dad Bod Summer, here we come!