Chrissy Teigen took to Instagram to update her 34.9 million followers that her “road dog” Pippa died in her arms. The post comes days after Teigen posted a picture with a caption describing herself as “lost” and “depressed” following her cyberbullying scandal. The model wrote in the post “Cancel club is a fascinating thing and I have learned a whollllle lot. Only a few understand it and it’s impossible to know til you’re in it.”

Teigen and husband John Legend have shared a total of four pets together, the first two of which were an English Bulldog named Puddy, who died in 2018, followed by Pippa. Penny, a three-legged French Bulldog, and another French Bulldog named Paul or Pablo depending on the day round out the pack. I guess the Legend-Teigen family has a favorite breed.

Pippa lived with the family for 10 years, according to Teigen’s Instagram post. In her own words, Pippa loved her pearl necklace and “never took sh*t” from any new dog.

Surely this is devastating timing for Teigen, as she’s already struggling with mental health issues as well as saying “Going outside sucks and doesn’t feel right, being at home alone with my mind makes my depressed head race.”

This is the first time Teigen has addressed her mental health regarding her cyberbullying scandal since June of this year. She’s been pretty quiet, only taking to Instagram as of late to post snapshots of a family vacation after a brief social media hiatus.

However you feel about Teigen and the scandal that surrounds her, the loss of a pet is a big blow to the family, no matter who you are. Teigen being transparent about mental health issues is a positive, however the term “cancelled” makes it hard to see if Teigen has reflected at all on the lessons these past few months could have taught her.