It was arguably the most contentious and cringe-inducing comeback of 2019. With its obnoxious toe-flossing and spindly kittenish heel, many scorned the thong heel’s modern resurrection, resenting the very day a Jenner or Hadid wore it out in public thusly promoting a mass of willing copycats. And like dominoes, they fell. A Kardashian one day, a Jenner the next. One Hadid sister, then another. Even Rihanna touted it toey style, proving not even she could resist its call from the fashion wild. And while the thong heel is most certainly not gone (nor forgotten), it has had a 2020 update…

Ta-da! Introducing (or rather reintroducing) the thong flatform.

Ah yes, your thong flatform-wielding manicurist was onto something: one of the “ugliest” shoes from the nineties, early oughts has staged its comeback.

I personally recall several iterations of the thong flatform / wedge in my gorgeous noughties wardrobe: a deep magenta pair with beads by Nine West so rock hard it’s amazing I could even put one foot in front of the other (and not kill someone / myself), a black rubber platform thong with adorning synthetic white flower, and the most fabulous (and arguably most stylish), a pair with rainbow platform made entirely of foam. Truly magical stuff.

While the shoe led to some schoolyard bullying, now Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen are charging nearly $1300 for a pair – so who’s laughing now?! (Definitely not us after blowing $1300 on a pair). But it’s true, the stacked thong now comes in high fashion form via perennial pedlars of chic, The Row, alongside other luxurious variations from Fendi, Givenchy and Dries Von Noten, to name but a few.

With its origins in Geta, the traditional Japanese footwear that hybridise a clog and a flip-flop, The Row’s modern re-appropriation has become the it-shoe of the season, swiftly replacing its sell-out bare sandal of seasons past.

But if you really want to rekindle some good old fashioned nostalgia, try out the Crocs version which as all the hallmarks of the OG, or a furry pair by Tommy Jeans, all of which round out our fab five for the week.

So whether it’s heeled, stacked or wedged, the thong is not going anywhere. May as well make it comfortable.

1. The Row

Ginza leather and suede flatform flip flops, the row at matches fashion, $1296. SHOP NOW

2. Tommy 

Colour-block platform sandals, Tommy Jeans at farfetch, $67. SHOP NOW

3. Fendi 

Promenade quilted suede platform sandals, fendi, $1110. SHOP NOW

4. Givenchy

Kyoto platform-sole leather flip flops, givenchy at matches fashion, $830. SHOP NOW

5. Crocs

Crocband platform flip flops, crocs at the iconic, $70. SHOP NOW