Cara Delevingne
Credit: Michael Kovac/Getty Images for IMDb

Appearing on an episode of the Goop Podcast with Gwyneth Paltrow, model and actress Cara Delevingne has opened up about her struggles in grappling with her sexuality early on. She says she grew up in an “old-fashion household” and didn’t know what it meant to be gay.

“I didn’t know anyone who was gay,” the 28-year-old admitted. “I didn’t know that was a thing and actually I think growing up I wasn’t knowledgeable of the fact I was homophobic.”

Despite her attraction towards women, she felt “disgusted” by the thought of being with a same-sex partner. “I was like, ‘Oh my god, I would never, that’s disgusting, ugh’,” she told Paltrow.

“I do correlate the massive depression and the suicidal moments of my life [to that] because I was so ashamed of ever being that. But actually, that was the part of me that I love so much and accept,” Delevingne said.

In the past the Paper Towns actress has revealed she identifies as pansexual. The term refers to having a sexual, romantic, or emotional attraction towards people regardless of their sex or gender identity. In a cover story for Variety in June 2020, Delevingne elaborated, “However one defines themselves, whether it’s ‘they’ or ‘he’ or ‘she,’ I fall in love with the person — and that’s that. I’m attracted to the person.”

Speaking to Paltrow, the English model said she has found peace with her sexuality.

“I feel so much more comfortable in the fluidity of what it is to be just a human and to be an animal, almost, because that’s what we are.”

Delevingne boasts boasts 43.5 million followers on Instagram and has harnessed her platform to advocate for LGBTQI+ rights.

In June 2019, Delevingne and Pretty Little Liars actress Ashley Benson confirmed their relationship. By April 2020 and amid a worldwide lockdown, the couple reportedly split.

If this story is in any way triggering, please call LifeLine Australia on 13 11 14. If you are in the U.S., the American Foundation For Suicidal Prevention is here to help. Call 800 273 8255. Or text “Talk” to 741 741. 

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