For the past few years, being single has been reframed as a kind of modern flex. Social media celebrates “self-partnership,” solo living, and choosing independence over compromise. By the end of 2025, that narrative reached peak visibility, with viral TikToks asking — sometimes jokingly, sometimes pointedly — “Is having a boyfriend embarrassing now?”
But while the cultural conversation has leaned toward autonomy and self-definition (which, we fully support by the way!), new psychological research suggests there may be a quieter, more complicated emotional reality unfolding beneath the trend — especially for young adults who remain single well into their late twenties.
We were intrigued by this, so we dove into the research for you.
What the Research Actually Looked At
A large, long-term study led by researchers at the University of Zurich followed more than 17,000 young people in Germany and the U.K. over more than a decade. Participants were surveyed annually from their mid-teens through their late twenties, with a specific focus on individuals who had never been in a romantic relationship at the start of the study.
Published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, the research tracked how prolonged singlehood intersected with emotional well-being over time — looking at life satisfaction, loneliness, and depressive symptoms as young people moved through early adulthood.
Who Is Most Likely to Stay Single Longer?
One of the study’s more surprising findings is who tends to remain single the longest.
According to the data, young adults who stayed single into their late twenties were more likely to be:
- Men
- Highly educated
- Living alone or with a parent
- Already reporting lower levels of well-being
Rather than portraying long-term singlehood as purely a confident lifestyle choice, the findings suggest it’s often shaped by a mix of social structure, emotional health, and life priorities — like education and career focus — rather than empowerment alone.
As lead researcher Michael Krämer explains, psychological well-being doesn’t just result from relationship status — it can also influence whether someone enters a relationship in the first place.
The Emotional Shift That Happens Over Time
In adolescence and early adulthood, there was little difference in well-being between those who eventually partnered up and those who stayed single. But as the years passed, the gap widened.
By their late twenties, long-term singles were more likely to report:
- Lower overall life satisfaction
- Increased feelings of loneliness
- A rise in depressive symptoms
Importantly, this wasn’t about short periods of being single or intentional breaks from dating. The emotional impact became more noticeable the longer singlehood lasted — suggesting that time, rather than relationship status alone, plays a crucial role.
What Happens When People Enter Their First Relationship
One of the clearest findings from the study is what happens when young adults do enter their first romantic relationship — regardless of how late it occurs.
Across the board, participants reported:
- Higher life satisfaction
- Reduced loneliness
- Improved overall emotional well-being
These benefits showed up quickly and, in many cases, lasted. While entering a relationship didn’t significantly change depressive symptoms on its own, it did meaningfully improve how connected and fulfilled people felt in their daily lives.
So… Is Being Happy Being Single a Lie?
No, of course not! Well, not exactly — but it’s also not the full story.
The cultural shift toward normalizing singlehood has been vital, especially in dismantling outdated ideas that equate partnership with worth. But the study suggests that prolonged singlehood, particularly when it’s unintentional, can quietly chip away at well-being over time.
In other words, choosing to be single can be empowering. Feeling stuck in singlehood — especially as peers couple up — can feel isolating.
That tension is precisely why the end-of-2025 discourse around dating felt so emotionally charged. The irony of asking whether having a boyfriend is “embarrassing” is that many young adults are simultaneously craving connection while being told they shouldn’t need it.
Women in particular, in today’s day and age, are finally living in a time where they can earn their own money and make their own decisions, without having to rely on a man. Which, in turn, has led many women to choose to stay single longer and not settle (and, again, we stan that!). However, it doesn’t necessarily mean they want to be on their own forever.
A More Honest Take on Modern Dating
The takeaway isn’t that everyone should rush into a relationship — or that being single is inherently harmful. It’s that emotional health and romantic connection are deeply intertwined, even in an era that prizes independence.
Perhaps the most modern-aligned truth is this: empowerment isn’t about rejecting relationships or idealizing them. It’s about having the freedom — and emotional support — to choose what actually nourishes you, without shame on either side.
And sometimes, that means wanting love and autonomy at the same time.
