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Loneliness Is Nothing New<\/h4>\n
According to research<\/a> published in 2015 by Professor Julianne Holt-Lunstad of Brigham Young University in Utah, social isolation is more lethal than smoking 15 cigarettes a day or obesity. Untreated, Holt-Lunstad\u2019s studies found that feelings of isolation and loneliness can make us heart sick and increase the likelihood of depression, inflammation, high blood pressure, and death from heart disease.<\/p>\n Desperate for US senators to recognize loneliness as a public health priority, Holt-Lunstad testified before the US Senate Aging Committee in 2017. \u201cOur social relationships are widely considered crucial to emotional well-being; however, the possibility that social connection may be a biological need, vital to physical wellbeing and even survival, is commonly unrecognized,\u201d the court\u2019s transcripts<\/a> read.<\/p>\n \u201cExtreme examples clearly illustrate infants in custodial care who lack human contact and often die, and social isolation is so distressing that solitary confinement has been used as a form of punishment and even torture,\u201d she continued before pointing to her earlier work and suggesting that the US was indeed facing a loneliness epidemic.<\/p>\n Holt-Lunstad\u2019s findings were important. At the time, more than one-fifth of adults in both the US and Britain reported<\/a> that they often or always felt lonely. More than half of American adults were unmarried, and researchers had found<\/a> that even among those who were married, 30 percent of relationships were severely strained. Loneliness was well and truly affecting people.<\/p>\n But it is only now, and in the context of the pandemic, that people are really beginning to appreciate the enduring health consequences of feeling alone in this world.<\/p>\n Dr. Michelle H. Lim, a psychologist at Swinburne University in Melbourne, Australia, published a paper<\/a> in 2016 titled \u201cLoneliness Over Time: The Crucial Role of Social Anxiety,\u201d which zeroed in on how social anxiety and paranoia \u2013 two mental health symptoms that relate to the fear of others \u2013 could contribute to loneliness.<\/p>\n \u201cWe found that loneliness preceded these mental health difficulties,\u201d Lim explains to GRAZIA on the phone from the Australian state of Victoria, ironically in the midst of a strict lockdown at the time. \u201cWhat we also found which was really interesting was that if you had a fear of people \u2013 if you\u2019ve ever feared that they\u2019ve judged you or you feared they thought badly of you or you feared being embarrassed or humiliated \u2013 you\u2019re also more likely to be lonely.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cSocial anxiety comes from a lot of avoidance so if you imagine that people think poorly of you all the time, you\u2019re likely to feel lonely,\u201d Lim continued. \u201cThis has got wide implications on the way we think about loneliness because a lot of people will say, \u2018why don\u2019t you just make a new friend or join a group.\u2019 But for some, that is the scariest thing imaginable. You\u2019re suggesting they go into a lion\u2019s den.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI think the beating in our hearts was put there to remind us that even when we are alone in the world, we march on. That even in the enormous dark and quiet, we always have someone to lean on, to embrace and turn to. That even when we have no one else, we always have ourselves.\u201d – writer Beau Taplin<\/span><\/p>\n In 2018, it was reported<\/a> that 3.1 million people worked on the island of Manhattan during the week (the population reduces to 1.6 million at night time as people go home). However, one of the city\u2019s great ironies is how lonely it can be despite literally being surrounded by millions; there are so many people on the streets, crammed into the subways, lining up at bars.<\/p>\n Living and working in New York during its bitterly cold winters, I would, admittedly, often find myself booking in drinks with different friends and acquaintances on most nights. It was a great way to see the city \u2013 but the distance I felt between myself and the people around me was great. I craved connection, and in the city of networking, I wasn\u2019t getting enough of it. But did that mean I was lonely<\/em>?<\/p>\n \u201cLoneliness is the perception or subjective experience of feeling alone, or the discrepancy between one\u2019s desired level of social connection and the actual level of social connection,\u201d Holt-Lunstad tells GRAZIA. \u201cSomeone can be lonely but not isolated, or isolated but not lonely\u201d she adds.<\/p>\nYou Don\u2019t Have To Be Alone To Feel Lonely<\/h4>\n
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