{"id":25158,"date":"2021-06-02T23:31:56","date_gmt":"2021-06-02T23:31:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/graziamagazine.com\/us\/?post_type=articles&p=25158"},"modified":"2021-06-03T11:03:50","modified_gmt":"2021-06-03T11:03:50","slug":"jonathan-bennett-jaymes-vaughan-wedding-band-interview","status":"publish","type":"articles","link":"https:\/\/graziamagazine.com\/us\/articles\/jonathan-bennett-jaymes-vaughan-wedding-band-interview\/","title":{"rendered":"How Jonathan Bennett and Jaymes Vaughan Are Paving the Way for Same-Sex Couples"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Jonathan
Credit: Matthew Schueller<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

The wedding world has grown more inclusive but still has a long way to go. Case in point: when TV host Jaymes Vaughan was planning a <\/span>summer proposal<\/span><\/a> for his longtime boyfriend, actor Jonathan Bennett, the jewelry industry came up short. “I could not find a single major retailer that had anything that was specifically for us,” he recalls in an exclusive interview with <\/span>GRAZIA USA.\u00a0<\/span><\/em>To move forward with popping the question in November of last year, Vaughan reached out to Kay Jewelers to create custom white gold bands for the occasion.<\/span><\/p>\n

The rings generated so much fanfare that Kay and Vaughan made them widely available, specifically for LGBTQIA+ couples similarly lacking options.\u00a0<\/span>Starting today, the brand has released a similar version of their design to the public.\u00a0<\/span>Our Ring by Jaymes + Jonathan<\/span><\/a> is now available on the jeweler’s website. <\/span>“We need to pave the way,” says Vaughan. “We thought we were just going to get engaged to get married, and that was it. But as we’re seeing these spaces that don’t exist, we’re like, ‘Let’s create them, let’s go for it, so another couple after us doesn’t have to go through this.'”<\/span><\/p>\n

Ahead, Vaughan and Bennett chat with\u00a0<\/span>GRAZIA<\/span><\/em> to discuss the wedding band they’ve designed for Kay Jewelers, wedding planning, and why LGBTQIA+ representation matters now more than ever.<\/span><\/p>\n

GRAZIA: Congratulations on your engagement! Jaymes, how did you pop the question to Jonathan?<\/strong><\/p>\n

JAYMES VAUGHAN:<\/strong> \u00a0<\/span><\/strong>Throughout our relationship, we were always trying to find a song that was “our song.” We couldn’t find it\u2014there was always a word that was wrong, or a line that was wrong. Well, my background is in music, so I was trying to figure out, “How am I going to propose to this guy that is in Hallmark movies and romantic comedies?” Like, he’s already done it all in the movies\u2014how can I possibly make this better? I was like, “Oh, I know what I can do! I’ll write a song that fits us perfectly, and then I’ll propose to him.” I wrote this song for him called “Our Song,” and my plan was to do it in the backyard of our house in Palm Springs when his family was here for Thanksgiving. And [I] got the ring, got the song, got the fianc\u00e9, got him in the backyard, had the family here all socially distanced and spread out, and popped the question. In the video on Instagram, you’ll see Jonathan doing the ugliest cry you’ve ever seen in the entire world. I knew it was going to happen the minute he walked outside and saw me with the sign I had. I had a sign that said, “We never could find our song, so I wrote it for you.”\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\"Jonathan
Credit: Kay Jewelers<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

GRAZIA: You decided to make your custom Kay design available to the public. How did that level of\u00a0collaboration come about?<\/strong><\/p>\n

JV: <\/strong>There’s still so much underrepresentation for the LGBTQIA+ community in the engagement and wedding industry. From the start, when I designed this ring to propose with, I was saying to Kay, “Guys, this needs to be something that exists for everyone.” After I proposed to Jonathan, people started custom ordering the ring. That only added fuel to the fire of realizing we needed to do this, and that is why we jumped on it, and we’re doing it now.<\/p>\n

GRAZIA: What was the process like when you were designing the ring and choosing materials?<\/strong><\/p>\n

JV: <\/strong>I traced the outline of my poke takeout container, sketched around that, and that\u2019s how we first started with the design team, going back and forth and getting this idea to come to life. I wanted the diamonds to be on the inside, because when you look at them, they\u2019re kind of a hidden diamond. When you look at the top of it, you don\u2019t really see them, but on the inside they\u2019re all there. So, if you\u2019re a blingy person\u2014which I am, and I wanted that\u2014it\u2019s there, and you can see it anytime you want to see it. But if you\u2019re not a blingy person, like Jonathan, it\u2019s only there when you want to see it.<\/p>\n

\"Jonathan
OUR RING BY JAYMES & JONATHAN MEN’S DIAMOND WEDDING BAND, $3,200 VIA KAY JEWELERS. SHOP NOW<\/strong><\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

GRAZIA: This is the first time that a larger retailer like Kay is making same-sex wedding bands. <\/strong>\u00a0What has your involvement in this experience been like?<\/strong><\/p>\n

JONATHAN BENNETT:<\/strong> Making history<\/em> making the same-sex wedding bands, might I add! Having a ring that\u2019s available from a major retailer, that you don\u2019t have to go in and custom order, takes away the \u201cotherness\u201d of your LGBTQ+ relationship. It says, \u201cHey, we have something available to you, because your love is just as valid and means just as much as everyone else\u2019s love.\u201d You don\u2019t have to customize and custom make something special so you can have a ring.<\/p>\n

JV:<\/strong> I remember the first time I got a message from someone, this guy Max, who proposed his boyfriend. He reached out to me and said, \u201cI\u2019ve been trying to find a place to go in my town where I feel safe to walk in the store, and I\u2019m not going to get weird looks, I\u2019m not going to get treated poorly. You doing this let me know that I could do it with Kay. And I went and got the same ring design that you did, and I\u2019m proposing with it.\u201d In that moment, I was like, \u201cThis is the reason we do these things.\u201d Even if it\u2019s just for that one person and his engagement, and his moment, that he got to have this and not worry about it. Because, you know how it is. I mean, you walk into a place, there\u2019s still places you don\u2019t know, \u201cAm I safe to walk in here? Is my love is safe to be in here right now?\u201d And so, to be able to create a space like that\u2026it\u2019s phenomenal, and it\u2019s so moving. I hope it\u2019s just the beginning of major change in the industry, to be more inclusive of the LGBTQ+ community and our love.<\/p>\n

GRAZIA: Let\u2019s talk wedding planning! What has your process been like, so far?<\/strong><\/p>\n

JV: <\/strong>You know, it\u2019s a lot of work. Luckily, there are resources like The Knot<\/em> that are helping us plan. They have so many useful resources on their site\u2014we can just go in, and it will walk you through the process of what you should be doing and when. For us, the biggest question was just picking \u201cwhere.\u201d Our \u201cwhere\u201d was a no-brainer, and that was UNICO Resort in Riviera Maya, Mexico, because it is one of the most welcoming, diverse places we\u2019ve ever been. For a member of the LGBTQ+ community, you feel so welcome and so celebrated from the moment you walk into that resort. So, we knew that was the place we wanted to say, \u201cI do.\u201d We have this whole campaign we\u2019re doing, called \u201cSafe and Celebrated,\u201d where we are highlighting the retailers, places, people, et cetera who were not only safe to work with, but we\u2019re celebrated when we\u2019re working with them.<\/p>\n

JB: <\/strong>I think, from the moment you get engaged until your honeymoon, there should be nothing but excitement and joy every step of the way in every decision you\u2019re making. We really wanted to curate a list of places and businesses that are safe and celebrated for the community, so you only experience joy on this entire journey. We don\u2019t want to talk about it, but we actually got told \u201cNo\u201d at a resort prior. It was actually the best thing that ever happened, because it really triggered us to realize that we still need to evolve so much as a society, and in the wedding industry, to be inclusive of everyone.<\/p>\n

GRAZIA: Have you been approaching different parts of the planning process together, or “divide and conquering” elements of your wedding?<\/strong><\/p>\n

JV:<\/strong>\u00a0Well, we started a Pinterest board.<\/p>\n

JB: <\/strong>Never thought I would say I\u2019d be that person, but we did [Laughs]. We started a Pinterest board!<\/p>\n

JV:<\/strong> It\u2019s your wedding, it\u2019s no one else\u2019s, you should do what you want. Our bridal parties are actually not going to be \u201cgroomsmen,\u201d or \u201cmaid of honor,\u201d or \u201cbest man\u201d\u2014we\u2019re simply calling everybody our \u201cbest.\u201d They won\u2019t be in specific, traditionally gendered clothing, they can wear what they want. We know our whole vibe is going to be very much greens and whites, a lot of white roses. White roses signify Jonathan\u2019s mom, who passed seven years ago.<\/p>\n

JB:<\/strong> One tradition that we want to break and make our own tradition is that we\u2019re going to see each other on our wedding day. We think that\u2019s the silliest tradition, that you don\u2019t see each other on the wedding day. He\u2019s my best friend, and, well, I don\u2019t have a lot of family left. If I don\u2019t talk to him, who am I going to talk to on my wedding day?<\/p>\n

JV:<\/strong>\u00a0So we\u2019re going to wake up, just like normal, and then go get married.<\/p>\n

JB: <\/strong>Yeah. Who\u2019s going to fix my hair if he\u2019s not there?<\/p>\n

\"Jonathan
Credit: Matthew Schueller<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

GRAZIA: Do either of you know what you\u2019re wearing for the big day yet?<\/strong><\/p>\n

JV:<\/strong> We want to go as timeless as possible. We want it to be, if you see photos, you [won\u2019t] know if it\u2019s from 1922, 2022, or 2122. So, we definitely want to do a classic, clean tux look. As far as what color those are going to be yet\u2026<\/p>\n

JB:<\/strong>\u00a0I want blue!<\/p>\n

JV:<\/strong> He wants blue, I want black. I want it as classic as possible, right? We\u2019re trying to figure out if he\u2019s going to wear a different one than me, if we\u2019re going to wear the same thing, if they\u2019re going to be the same vibe, or a little bit different. Again, there\u2019s not a ton of tradition in this, so we\u2019re paving our own way as far as what we want to do.<\/p>\n

GRAZIA: What advice do you have for other couples planning weddings right now?<\/strong><\/p>\n

JB:<\/strong>\u00a0Take tradition and throw it to the wind, because it is your special day. I find that sometimes people get caught up in the stressors of what they\u2019re supposed to do on their wedding, instead of the joys of what they get to do on their wedding.<\/p>\n

JV:<\/strong>\u00a0Yeah, you\u2019re marrying your best friend that day. Make sure that you are enjoying it and not stressing the process.<\/p>\n

GRAZIA: As Pride month begins, what do you think people can do to continue opening doors for LGBTQIA+ communities?<\/strong><\/p>\n

JV: <\/strong>The best thing anyone can do, whether it\u2019s a business or a person, but especially businesses, is prioritize representation. You know, be pioneers like Kay Jewelers\u00a0and represent individuals of the LGBTQ+ community loudly and proudly. And don\u2019t just do it in the month of June! We appreciate it, we appreciate the support in the month of June\u2014we do, we do, we do. But show that support all year long.<\/p>\n

JB<\/strong>: I think the other big thing for allies, but also within our community, is to listen. If someone tells you, \u201cI don\u2019t feel represented here,\u201d don\u2019t get defensive. Instead, say, \u201cOkay, what can I do to help?\u201d And then listen.<\/p>\n

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