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The Principles Of Pleasure launched with little fanfare on Netflix last week. Like most slow-burn hits on the streaming service, many of us swiped past it all weekend, only to start seeing it pop up all over the internet as those who didn’t skip it started raving about its mind-blowing content.
Focusing on female pleasure and how it’s been dismissed for so long, many of us don’t even know basic anatomy like where our vulvas are, the documentary will have you feeling empowered and, yeah, pretty angry at the level of sexual oppression women and non-binary people have experienced.
It’s not the most brilliant documentary I’ve ever watched – at times, it tends to be a little twee and over-produced. But as someone who believed I knew a lot about my body and how I enjoy sex, I finished the series feeling overwhelmed with new information – and totally inspired to explore new ideas and concepts around female pleasure.
To simplify it for you, here are my top five takeaways from The Principles Of Pleasure.
1. Sex Education Is Woefully Substandard
One major realisation I had during the first episode of The Principles Of Pleasure was how appalling sex education is not just in Australia, but globally. It’s not just our school curriculum, either. As one of the women puts it in the episode, we’re taught to feel ashamed of our bodies from childhood.
Remember when you were curious about your body as a child? From playing ‘doctor’ with friends to asking your parents and teachers questions about sex and genitalia, we were punished for our curiosity, which really set us up to treat sex and pleasure as something we shouldn’t talk about, let alone enquire about.
Surely in 2022 it’s time for us to rethink how we speak about sex and the body with children and teenagers. Of course, there should be boundaries around how and when we explain certain things to do with sex, but the topic shouldn’t be taboo.
2. Why Haven’t We Normalised Enjoying Porn As Women Yet?
One topic explored in episode three is sexual exploration, especially pornography. It was fascinating to see my own experience with porn reflected on screen – most of the women spoken to in the series said they felt for a long time that porn was not something for them, until they realised that the porn stereotype wasn’t the only way to experience porn.
Speaking to famed inclusive porn site XConfessions founder Erika Lust, it’s clear that modern porn has started to accommodate female and non-binary desires in a way the industry never did before. It’s not limited to hardcore anymore – women in the series speak about erotic fiction, steamy films and enjoying porn that was far removed from what they enjoy in the bedroom. In turn, we’re slowly normalising the enjoyment of porn as women.
3. The Clitoris Wasn’t Even Fully Mapped Out Until 2005
This blew my mind. If you want a sign that female sexual pleasure wasn’t even remotely a concern for society, this is it. Thank god for Australian Urologist Helen O’Connell, who finally mapped out the full extent of the clitoris in 2005.
FYI, the clitoris goes way beyond what we can see on the surface. It’s actually a massive organ that extends in four parts behind our vagina. Also – the g-spot doesn’t exist! What we think is the g-spot is just another form of clitoral stimulation, except from the inside.
4. You Might Think You’ve Had An Orgasm, But You Could Be Wrong
According to The Principles Of Pleasure, fifty per cent of women think they’ve had an orgasm before, but actually haven’t. They discuss the “orgasm gap” – where over ninety per cent of men have had an orgasm, compared to under sixty-five per cent of women.
This is attributed to a lack of education around the female orgasm, coupled with the fact that our orgasms aren’t usually defined by ejaculation the way male orgasms are. But I’d also add to this that I believe we then seek education around the female orgasm from film and tv, where the female orgasm is described as “seeing stars” and other lofty, dramatic terms.
The reality is, as Dr Nicole Prause explains in the doco, that the definition of a female orgasm is “eight to 12 contractions that occur throughout the pelvis that start just shy of a second apart, and increase in latency until their termination”.
So if you’ve experienced that, congratulations – you’ve had an orgasm. If not, The Principles Of Pleasure has your back. The next topic? Sex toys, and an actual, proper explainer of what each does for your body. You’d better believe I added several to cart after viewing.
The Principles Of Pleasure is streaming on Netflix now.
