Ah, the micro bag. Has there been such a trend to shake the fashion world so? With its itsy-bisty structure, its teeny-tiny details, its spoof-like size, it challenged our instinctual practicality, laughing in the face of both form and function. And while we thought we’d seen the smallest of them all in Jacquemus’ Le Petit Chiquito (arguably the modern day father of le micro), Lizzo and Valentino have just upped – or rather downed – even that bag’s minuscule 4.5cm size.
Arriving at the 2019 American Music Awards in tiers of peachy Valentino, or as Lizzo put it, “Valentin-HO”, the indubitable star of the look was in fact not the ruffled couture, but the marvellously mini bag hanging from her diamond-crusted manicure.
The custom white bag – replete with V-logo clasp and bijou silver top handle with charm – equated to about the size of one of her Eri Ishizu-painted fingernails, or, more aptly, the size of her “f*cks” given. “@maisonvalentino bag big enough for my fucks to give. Big body bitch in a Valentin-HO custom look for @amas 🍑💦”, she captioned the look on Instagram.
Naturally, the internet has gone into meme-overdrive, celebrating the bag with the ridiculous banter it deserves. “Billionaires paying their taxes,” one fan wrote of the bag on Twitter, while another threw shade on fellow musician Katy Perry. “Why is Lizzo carrying the amount of people that supported back Katy Perry since 2017?” But our personal favourite was the fan who brought out the fashion big guns: Barbie. “That’s it. I’m going to carry Barbie’s purse and then my bag will be the smallest of all the mini bags.” Indeed, at the rate fashion’s going, soon Polly Pocket’s nano handbag will be deemed real-person worthy. As for now, all hail Queen Lizzo and her itty-bitty Valentino. Turns out good things do come in teeny-tiny packages after all.