Second only to being coffined in a sweltering elevator with seven others, the inarguable highlight of Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week Australia 2016 has been eavesdropping on the obscene things people say when they definitely know that they’re being looked at but fail to realise I’m fastidiously taking notes and broadcasting them to tens of thousands of people.

Though for the most part names and details of when they took place have been withheld in the interests of preserving peoples’ anonymity (and, more importantly, their SEO) you can either despair or take comfort in the knowledge that these are the unfiltered musings of Australia’s fashion industry as overheard during the second half of Fashion Week.

You can read more from the first half of the week here.  

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Cover image: Sonny Vandevelde